If your little monsters love a good giggle, you’re in the right place. Halloween jokes for kids are the perfect way to keep the spooky season silly instead of scary.
Whether you’re planning a classroom party, looking for joke cards to drop in trick-or-treat bags, or just want to make your kids laugh out loud at the dinner table, this ultimate collection has you covered.
We’ve handpicked the funniest, cleanest, and most kid-approved Halloween jokes that are sure to bring smiles no broomstick required.
Scroll down for belly laughs, spooky puns, and pumpkin-powered punchlines your kids will want to share all October long.
150 Unique Halloween Jokes for Kids
Classic Halloween Jokes for Kids
These timeless jokes never get old—and they’re easy for kids to remember and retell!
- Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
Because he had no body to go with! - What do you call a cleaning skeleton?
The grim sweeper. - What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert?
I scream! - Why did Dracula become a vegetarian?
Because biting necks was just too draining. - What kind of music do mummies like best?
Wrap music. - What do witches use to style their hair?
Scare spray. - Why are graveyards noisy?
Because of all the coffin. - What’s a ghost’s favorite fruit?
Boo-berries! - What room do ghosts avoid?
The living room. - Why did the zombie get a job?
He wanted to make a little dead money. - What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite. - What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument?
The trom-bone. - Why don’t mummies take vacations?
They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind. - What is a monster’s favorite play?
Romeo and Ghouliet. - How do you make a witch itch?
Take away her W.
Ghost & Ghoul Jokes for Kids
Nothing spooky here—just ghostly giggles that kids will love!
- What do you call a ghost in the rain?
A drizzle spirit. - Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
Day-scare centers. - What’s a ghost’s favorite ride at the carnival?
The roller-ghoster. - Why do ghosts hate the rain?
It dampens their spirits. - What do ghosts use to wash their hair?
Shamboo. - Why don’t ghosts like fast food?
Because they can’t catch it. - What game do little ghosts like to play?
Hide and shriek! - What do you get if you cross a ghost with a dog?
A terrier-fied spirit! - Why did the ghost go into the bar?
For the boos. - What do you call a ghost with a broken leg?
Hoblin’ Goblin. - Where do ghosts shop?
At the boo-tique. - How do ghosts say goodbye?
“I’ll spook to you later!” - What’s a ghost’s favorite sport?
Boo-ling. - Why was the ghost such a good cheerleader?
Because she had lots of spirit. - What did the ghost wear to the Halloween party?
A boo-tie!
Vampire Jokes for Kids
These jokes are all fang and no fright perfect for a giggle under the full moon!
- What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A blood orange. - Why did the vampire get a job at the blood bank?
He always wanted to work with his favorite drinks. - What do you call a vampire who lives in the kitchen?
Count Spatula. - Why don’t vampires go to barbecues?
They don’t like stakes. - How do vampires start letters?
Tomb it may concern… - What’s a vampire’s least favorite meal?
A steak to the heart. - Where do vampires keep their money?
In a blood bank, of course! - Why was the vampire artist so famous?
He could draw blood. - What kind of dog do vampires like best?
Bloodhounds. - How did the vampire get around town?
He took the blood vessel. - What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman?
Frostbite (yes, it’s worth repeating—it always gets laughs!). - Why don’t vampires like mirrors?
Because they can’t see themselves winning. - What do vampires use to keep their breath fresh?
Bat mints. - Why did the vampire flunk art class?
Because he could only draw blood. - What’s a vampire’s favorite holiday?
Fangs-giving.
Witch Jokes for Kids
Broomsticks, black hats, and buckets of laughter—these witch jokes are spell-tacular!
- Why don’t witches like to ride their brooms when they’re angry?
They’re afraid they’ll fly off the handle. - What kind of makeup do witches wear?
Mas-scare-a. - What do you call two witches who live together?
Broommates. - Why did the witch stay in bed all day?
She was spell-ing sick. - How do witches keep their hair in place?
With scare spray. - What do you call a witch’s garage?
A broom closet. - Why did the witch bring a ladder to the party?
She wanted to raise the spirits. - What happens if you cross a witch and a snowman?
You get a cold spell. - Why did the witch apply for a job?
She needed more spending spell-cash. - How do you know a witch is cooking?
You hear cackle-pots in the kitchen. - What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school?
Spelling. - What kind of tests do witches hate most?
Hex-ams. - Where do witches park their brooms?
At the broom stop. - What do you get when a witch gets angry?
You get out of her spell range! - Why did the witch join a gym?
She wanted to improve her hex-ercise.
Zombie Jokes for Kids
Slow walkers, fast punchlines—these zombie jokes are brainy fun for kids!
- Why did the zombie go to school?
Because he wanted to improve his deaducation. - What’s a zombie’s favorite bean?
Human beans. - Why don’t zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
Because they prefer to eat the fingers separately. - What did the zombie say after eating a comedian?
That guy tasted funny. - Why did the zombie start a band?
He had the deadliest beats. - How do zombies keep their hair in place?
With scare gel. - What’s a zombie’s favorite dessert?
Brain brownies. - Why did the zombie bring a ladder to the party?
To raise the dead. - What’s a zombie’s favorite subject in school?
Dead-ucation. - What’s a zombie’s favorite cereal?
Rice Creepies. - How do zombies introduce themselves?
“Pleased to eat you.” - Why did the zombie cross the road?
To get to the brain store. - What do you call a rich zombie?
A ghoul-ionaire. - What’s a zombie’s favorite instrument?
The organ. - Why are zombies so bad at sports?
They always drop the ball… and a few body parts too.
Costume & Trick-or-Treat Jokes for Kids
From costume fails to candy hauls—these jokes are perfect for Halloween night giggles!
- Why did the kid wear a traffic light for Halloween?
He wanted to stop, go, and get candy. - What do you call a nervous trick-or-treater?
A jitter bug. - What’s the scariest costume you can wear to a candy store?
An empty bag. - Why did the skeleton stay home on Halloween?
He didn’t feel like dressing up his bones. - What’s a pirate’s favorite Halloween costume?
Arrrrrrr-dvark. - Why did the banana go trick-or-treating?
Because it had peelings too. - What do kids say when they forget their costume?
“I’m dressed as someone who forgot!” - Why did the girl bring string to her costume?
She wanted to tie-dye her outfit. - What’s a mummy’s favorite part of trick-or-treating?
Getting wrapped up in the fun. - Why do ghosts make terrible trick-or-treaters?
Because they vanish after ringing the doorbell. - What do you get if you cross Halloween with a school test?
Trick-or-cheat! - Why did the superhero go trick-or-treating without his cape?
Because it was at the dry cleaners. - What candy do you give a robot on Halloween?
Nuts and bolts. - What’s the best way to win a costume contest?
Show up in a mirror costume—you always reflect greatness! - Why did the vampire wear a cape to trick-or-treat?
He didn’t want to bare his fangs in public.
Animal Halloween Jokes for Kids
These creepy, crawly, furry, and feathery jokes will have kids howling with laughter!
- What do you get when you cross a bat with a hamburger?
A bite to go. - Why did the black cat get detention?
For purring in class too loudly. - What’s a bat’s favorite game?
Hide and shriek. - Why don’t spiders celebrate Halloween?
They’re too webbed up with work. - How do owls invite each other to Halloween parties?
“Owl be there!” - What did the dog dress up as on Halloween?
A bark knight. - Why did the spider get a job on Halloween?
Because he was great at networking. - What’s a ghost’s favorite animal?
A scare-dy cat. - What kind of monster likes to dance?
The boogieman (especially when he’s a werewolf!). - What sound do evil turkeys make on Halloween?
Gobble-gobble-BOO! - Why don’t black cats play poker?
Because they’re afraid of bad luck. - What do you get when you cross a werewolf and a teacher?
Lots of howling homework. - What do you call a cat who can play the trumpet?
Toot-an-kitten! - What’s a spider’s favorite Halloween candy?
Fly Taffy. - Why did the owl dress as a pirate?
Because he wanted to say “Whoooo’s got me treasure?”
Candy Jokes for Kids
No tricks—just sweet laughs about Halloween’s most important subject: candy!
- What’s a ghost’s favorite candy?
Boo-ble gum! - Why did the candy corn go to school?
To become a smartie. - What candy do mummies love most?
Wrap taffy. - Why don’t skeletons eat too much candy?
Because it goes right through them. - What kind of candy do you give a vampire?
Suckers. - Why did the lollipop cross the road?
Because it was stuck to the chicken! - What’s a pumpkin’s favorite candy?
Pumpkin chews. - How do you know candy is sneaky?
It always snickers. - What’s a skeleton’s favorite candy bar?
Mr. Bone Bar. - Why was the chocolate bar so good at Halloween games?
Because it always had a few Twix up its sleeve. - What do you call stolen candy?
A sweet crime. - What candy never gets invited to parties?
Sour Patch Kids—they always start sweet but end sour! - Why don’t candies like playing hide and seek?
Because they always get unwrapped. - What do you call candy that sings?
Pop rocks stars. - Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to someone’s shoe!
Halloween Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids
Knock-knock jokes never go out of style—especially when they’re dressed up for Halloween!
- Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don’t cry—it’s just a joke! - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Wanda.
Wanda who?
Wanda go trick-or-treating with me? - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Frank.
Frank who?
Frankenstein! Open up before I huff and puff! - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Witch.
Witch who?
Witch one of you ate all the candy? - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Howl.
Howl who?
Howl you know unless you open the door? - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Ghost.
Ghost who?
Ghost to show you how funny I am! - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Pumpkin.
Pumpkin who?
Pumpkin up the volume—let’s party! - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Bat.
Bat who?
Bat you can’t guess what I’m dressed as! - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Igor.
Igor who?
Igor my homework again! - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Skeleton.
Skeleton who?
Skeleton in the closet just wanted to say hi! - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Candy.
Candy who?
Candy I have more Halloween jokes, please? - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad it’s Halloween? - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Boo Boo.
Boo Boo who?
Stop crying—it’s Halloween fun time! - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Mummy.
Mummy who?
Mummy loves Halloween and funny jokes too! - Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Spider.
Spider who?
Spider my fear of bugs, I still love Halloween!
Pumpkin & Jack-o’-Lantern Jokes for Kids
These pumpkin jokes are packed with puns, laughs, and zero seeds!
- Why was the jack-o’-lantern afraid to cross the road?
He had no guts! - What do pumpkins do at a party?
They get lit! - Why was the pumpkin so bad at school?
Its brain was full of seeds. - How do pumpkins ask for a date?
“Pumpkin to know you better!” - Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch all night?
It was waiting for a boo. - What’s a pumpkin’s favorite sport?
Squash! - Why was the jack-o’-lantern so good at telling jokes?
Because it always had a light sense of humor. - What did one pumpkin say to the other on Halloween?
“Cut it out!” - What do you call a pumpkin that tells scary stories?
A spine-chilling squash. - Why do pumpkins never quarrel?
They have pumpkin spice and everything nice. - What’s a pumpkin’s favorite type of joke?
Gourd jokes! - Why did the pumpkin go to the doctor?
It had a bad case of the seeds. - What did the carved pumpkin say to the uncarved one?
“You don’t know jack!” - What do pumpkins use to fix their houses?
A pumpkin patch. - Why do jack-o’-lanterns love Halloween parties?
Because they always bring the glow!
Conclusion
Halloween isn’t just about costumes and candy it’s about creating memories kids will laugh about for years. Sharing Halloween jokes for kids is a fun, easy way to bring smiles to parties, classrooms, and even quiet evenings at home.
From silly skeletons to candy-loving vampires, these 150 kid-friendly jokes are perfect for making spooky season extra special.
Whether you print them, post them, or tell them aloud, one thing’s for sure, these jokes are a total treat. Happy laughing, and don’t forget to save your favorites for next year!
FAQs
Are Halloween jokes appropriate for school or classroom settings?
Yes! All the jokes in this article are kid-friendly, clean, and school-appropriate. Teachers can confidently use them during classroom parties, Halloween-themed lessons, or morning icebreakers.
What age group are these Halloween jokes best for?
These jokes are best suited for kids aged 4 to 14. They use simple language, playful humor, and familiar Halloween themes that young children and early tweens can easily enjoy.
Can I use these jokes in a kids’ Halloween event or performance?
Yes, these jokes are a hit at school assemblies, puppet shows, talent skits, and kids’ party games. They’re safe, relatable, and easy for kids to perform or repeat on stage.